Dearest Children,I love you so very, very much. Being your mother is such an unspeakable joy. You are good boys and I am truly blessed that the Lord has seen fit to entrust you to my care. Your father and I are working hard to raise you to be strong, resourceful, responsible, and holy men.
Having said this, I need to apologize to you.
As your first and constant teacher, I am afraid I have failed you. I hope that you can find it in your hearts to forgive me and rise above my inadequacy. There are so many things your father and I have tried to teach you. And there are so many more things we have yet to teach. I take full responsibility for the oversight of any important thing that I may have neglected to introduce to you. And now I would like to correct one particular wrong I have committed pertaining to your education. Please pay very close attention.
There is a thing called a garbage can.
Yes, a garbage can-- it is also called a trash can or a waste basket (perhaps the variety of alternate names has caused you some confusion). When you have personal trash, a garbage can is where you are supposed to put it. Personal trash can be paper, wrappers from the snacks you eat, Sonic cups, juice boxes, food that is "yuck" because you dropped it, stickers you don't want anymore, old gum, etc. When we are in the car, especially if I am in the driver's seat, you do not need to tell me that you have trash. Simply hold on to it and put it in the nearest garbage can when we get out of the car. You should not stuff it in the crack between your carseats--that is not garbage's home. You needn't hand your trash to me, even if you notice that one or both of my hands are empty. You ought not leave your trash on the ground outside, on the floor inside, or on my kitchen counter top, coffee table, or between your bed and the wall. Your father has worked very hard to provide for our family these many years that we might purchase a great number of garbage cans to place in convenient and appropriate places throughout our home and property. Some of our garbage cans are round, some are square. Some have lids, others do not. If you need a tutorial on what is a trash can and where we keep them, you only need to ask me and I would be happy to schedule that.
I'm so sorry for this glaring oversight. I hope we can work through this together.
Love, Mommy
6 comments:
so with you on this one! So with you!!!
What is with these little people? You think they would have been raised better. . .Oh, wait. . .
Hope all is well!
It seems I never taught mine about closets and drawers, so very ashamed of myself.
We're totally delinquent. Hope they all survive to adulthood!
Tonight, Bella made me aware of my neglect in establishing the rule "don't throw your shoe in Mommy's food" -- made me think of your post.
Oh Melissa. . .that's really creative! You are in so much trouble. ;-)
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